i've tried to escape
by not.so.tragically
Summary: \\her soul, now void of any and all light, openly accepts the darkness that it once easily knew—Regina!centric


_(but i keep sinking...)_

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"Swan, stay away!" The darkness swirled around Regina like a tornado, sucking out any bit of light left in her body. The vortex weaved it's way in and out of her body, easily removing the small portions of light magic she held within her. Even in her most secret places, the light was being snuffed out and destroyed. She could feel her heart giving into the strongest parts of the darkness, allowing herself to nearly become relaxed in the midst of it.

The magic starts playing at the tips of her fingers, and the power is already settling itself in her. "This is what has to happen!"

Everyone watched her, powerless in the midst of the battle. Her love watched, mouth agape, knowing he couldn't do anything to help her. If he even tried, everything would fall to pieces. Everything that they had worked for would be crushed, instantly.

Yet, Emma currently held the Dagger in her hand, ready to tether the darkness to herself. The Apprentice's words bounced around in her head, and she's prepared to save Regina. Her parents call to her from behind, but she ignores them, focusing on Regina only. Their eyes lock and Regina knows what she's going to do. "No!"

Stepping forward, she yells back to the person she could almost call her friend. "I can't let you do this, you've worked too hard to have your happiness destroyed!"

Regina had turned over a new leaf, even in moments where she could've easily reverted back, she fought temptation. She pushed the darkness, wrapped it up the best she could, and tucked it away. Then, she found herself in the possession of light magic, and then, _hope._ It had taken months of hard work for her to get to where she was, and it was about to be taken away.

"Villains don't get happy endings, Emma! You can only hold off an ending, you can't change it!" She knew that one way or another, evil would find it's way back into her heart, into her body, and there would be nothing she could do about it. "You're the Savior, you're a hero! I'm a villain! _I'm a villain._ " She resigns to her fate.

Feeling the last scraps of her own light being sucked from her, Regina finally succumbs to the power of the darkness. Knowing there was only one step left, she reaches her hand out. "Dagger!" The dagger obeys the command and pries itself from Emma's palm and into Regina's waiting one.

Finally complete, the darkness begins to completely encase itself into Regina and her heart. Her soul, now void of any and all light, openly accepts the darkness that it once easily knew. She rises from the stable ground as her friends watch helplessly from below. At first she felt suffocated, but now she can finally breathe.

The intensity of the darkness draws closer, reentering Regina, finding solace in her bones. The feeling isn't foreign and she finds herself looking back to the one she loved the most, who watched sadly from the ground.

When she looked at him, she almost fought back. She almost dropped the dagger, she almost refused to let this happen to her.

 _Almost._

So, she had to close her eyes, and her head tilted back as the last of her body is once again, ingrained with darkness.

Regina disappeared with the last of the darkness, the only thing left was the dagger falling from the sky with a new name inscribed as it hit the ground.

 _Regina Mills_

"Okay, where the hell am I?" Looking down at the black rags she was currently dressed, Regina shudders physically. "Is this supposed to be like peasant chic or something?" As she examines her clothing, she hears a light whistling from behind her. Snapping her head up, she expects to see a traveler or maybe a knight, and minutely she hopes that it's Swan.

But, instead she's met with—herself?

Rolling her eyes, she groans internally. "Please don't tell me you're some long-lost sister, that my mother abandoned or gave to a farmer and now you're here to exact your revenge on me, because I'm sorry, but now really isn't the time." Running her eyes over the woman who looked exactly like her, Regina stands a bit taller.

Regina—2.0?—smiles and shakes her head.

 _"Not exactly. I'm you, or more specifically, I'm your darkness. I figured this would be more appealing than any other form." Twirling around, 2.0 laughs quietly. "I am the darkness, the evil that resides in you, that formerly resided in Rumpelstiltskin and all the Dark Ones before him." Circling Regina, almost like a predator, 2.0 is wearing Regina's 'Evil Queen' attire._

Feeling entirely inferior, Regina looks back to her own clothing. "Wait, wait, hold on." Waving her right hand, Regina changes her tatters to a (black) outfit consisting of a long coat, knee boots, leather pants, and corset top. She notices that the color of her smoke had changed from it's usual indigo to a darker grey shade. Sighing contently, Regina looks back 2.0 who watches freely. "So, back to you. You're the Dark One?"

 _"You're the Dark One." She corrects, gesturing to Regina and her newly changed outfit. "I'm merely here to guide you in the right direction."_

"Why would I need guiding? I know how to be evil." Scoffing, Regina steps onto the grass, and begins walking in an unknown direction. She's not sure where she is, but she keeps walking with a purpose.

 _2.0 follows her, agreeing. "You do. But, there's more to it now that you're the Dark One, love." Flinching minutely at the word, Regina keeps walking, trying to ignore her. She attempts not to think about who she left on the ground, about her love who stared up at her sadly, unable to even attempt to help her. "And you can't ignore me, Regina. I'm here to stay as long as you have the darkness, you have me. You could call it a package deal._ "

"Am I this annoying?" After a few minutes of silence, Regina finally responds to her. "How am I supposed to get home?"

 _"You'll have to figure it out for yourself. Unless, of course, you'd like to test out these new powers of yours." 2.0 muses, examining her nails as they walk side by side. Regina scoffs and continues walking until she reaches a clearing. Looking down both ways and seeing nothing but emptiness, she turns left and walks cautiously. "So how are you going to get home Dark One?"_

Not responding, Regina continues walking until she sees a man pushing a cart. "Excuse me!" He stops, setting the cart down and turns on his heel. "I need directions, do you know where the nearest village is?"

"The closet thing to this forest here is Camelot." He answers, leaning back against his cart.

"Okay, so how do I get to Camelot?"

"That'll cost you." He smirks haughtily, standing upright. "Three pieces of silver."

Groaning within herself, Regina tries not to get frustrated. "I don't have any money."

"Four pieces." He continues, but he obviously didn't know who he was talking to. "Or maybe, you have some other form of payment I'd prefer..."

She knew what he was propositioning, and she was _not_ in the mood for games. "Just show me where Camelot is." She seethes.

"I will, if you show me something else." He looked her over deliciously, and Regina was absolutely disgusted. Beginning to walk away, completely repulsed, she began muttering to herself (and 2.0). Yet, he calls to her once more, "Come on, I'm sure you've done it before."

Stopping in her tracks, Regina looks angrily over her shoulder. "What?" She bites out, returning to stand in front of him. "I'll show you something you've never seen before." Running her hands up slowly over his shirt, she feigns a few tender touches and he smiles in victory. "Ready?" He nods eagerly, preparing himself.

Regina trails a hand over the left side of his chest, and smiles lightly, before plunging her hand inside, clutching the beating organ. Pulling her hand back, she holds his heart with a dark grin as he clutches his empty chest. The traveler's heart is spotted with black, but not entirely and Regina isn't surprised.

"That's my-my-my—" He stutters.

"Your heart." She finishes for him. "I told you it was something you've never seen before." She steps back in triumph, "Now tell me where Camelot is." At this point, she doesn't really want the directions, she just likes exerting every bit of her power. The feeling of a beating heart in her hand was on she was all too accustomed to.

He relays the details to her, and she nods even though she really isn't listening. "Please give it back."

"Are you begging?"

Shame is written all over his face and he whispers, "Yes." The traveler gets down on his knees and clasps his hands together. "Please, please, return my heart. Please." He looks as if he's about to cry, and his hands are shaking.

Viciousness spreads over her features, and the scene is all too familiar to her. She feels a delicious type of power run through her veins, and she won't refuse it. Feeding into it, she squeezes his heart a bit, watching as he gasps for air.

 _2.0 is grinning maliciously, hands perched on her hips. "Do it. Crush his heart, Regina. He deserves it." She encourages._

"Oh, you _are_ begging." Regina states, then leans down closer to his face, holding his heart tauntingly in front of his face. "Well, that's just too bad, I hate beggars." His heart gives her eyes a dark red glow, and makes her pearly white teeth, a light shade of pink. The organ beats fast, and the traveler finally closes his eyes, accepting his fate.

Just as she begins squeezing, she's interrupted. "Regina! No!" Unflinching, Regina sighs. _Of course, it's Emma Swan._

"Don't do it, Regina." Emma approaches her cautiously. "Don't give in to the darkness."

"It's a bit too late for that, Swan." Regina straightens up, but doesn't release his heart. She knew that she probably wouldn't end up crushing his heart; but she's still scared about how close she came so quickly.

Emma comes closer, holding her hands out. "This is different, Regina. This is much stronger, we both know that. Don't do this, we'll find a way to get this out of you." There's a moment of total silence, before Regina accedes, and returns his heart. He coughs as he rises to his feet and runs off, leaving his cart behind. She turns around and realizes the entire Hope Team is there, including her love, and she folds her arms across her chest. Resting a hand on Regina's shoulder, Emma guides her back into the forest. "C'mon, Granny's is this way."

Confused, but agreeing, Regina silently follows Emma, while 2.0 follows her.

 _"Don't worry, it's not over yet." Grinning, 2.0 vanishes in a cloud of smoke._

Regina turns to her sides and realizes that nobody saw what just happened. Summing it up to a figment of her imagination, she doesn't say a word, and keeps her pace behind Emma. As they actually approach Granny's diner, Regina scoffs mentally. Of course, they knew nothing about covertness, so it's just like them to bring the whole damn diner.

"Great job keeping it clandestine, Swan." Stepping inside, she sees the empty diner, save for Granny who stands behind the counter, eyeing Regina, but not saying a thing. "Did you bring the Jolly Green Giant so Guyliner could feel at home, too?"

"Jolly Roger." Emma and Hook correct her simultaneously, making Regina groan in annoyance.

Taking a seat on the outside of the booth, Hook next to her, Emma gestures for Regina to sit across from her. Acquiescing, Regina sits down, Robin next to her, as Henry, Snow, and Charming pull up chairs.

They sit in silence for a few minutes, before Regina becomes aware of the fact that everyone's staring at her. "Okay, I'll bite: What?"

Emma decides to go first. "Well, Regina, how do you feel?" Their looks are questioning and accusatory. Thei

"I'm just burning up in all the darkness, it's like _hellfire_ in my bones. Oh! Now, I'm overcome with the urge to murder all of you." Dramatically placing her hands over her heart, Regina gasps. "Please, release me from this pain, it's unlike anything I've ever known!" Looking at their unamused expressions, Regina chuckles. "Stop looking at me like that, I'm fine."

"Aye, we can tell by the way you almost crushed that man's heart." Hook muses, his tone dripping in sarcasm.

"How do you know I didn't have a good reason?" Regina counters, raising her eyebrows.

Robin decides to enter the conversation, partially on Regina's behalf. "Well, did you?" When she refuses to answer, Robin takes her hand in his squeezing lightly. "Don't worry, we're going to find away to rid you of this."

Just as quickly as she began leaning into him, she jerks away. "What? No, you're not."

"Regina." Snow interjects, her voice smooth. "You can not keep this kind of dark magic inside of you."

"What are the other options?" Regina asks, looking at them in shock. "Remove it and let it go into someone else? Someone who can't control it? Someone who's willing to do a lot worse than me? You're not going to remove this from me." Snow coughs into her hand, tucking a hair behind her ear. Then, when everyone begins to fidget, she realizes why. "Oh, I get it...you're all afraid of the Evil Queen, aren't you? Thanks for believing in me, of course. There's always redemption right, Swan?"

"It's not that!" Emma tries to explain. "We all know that dark magic is incredibly strong, we don't know what it could do to you. It's not safe to have it inside of you. We don't even know half of what Gold was dealing with when he had the Dark One's magic."

Shaking her head, Regina stands to her feet, looking down at them. "No, stop trying to act like you want the best for me. You don't want to get it _out_ of me; you want to get it _away_ from me." Turning on her heel, she walks outside the diner, slamming the door behind her.

Hearing footsteps behind her hers, she sighs, reaching a well. "This is not up for discussion, Swan. I'm not taking a poll on whether or not I should keep the darkness."

The deeper voice startles her. "I'm not Swan, and I'm not too fond of polls either." Whirling around, Regina's face to face with him. "I volunteered to come and talk sense into you."

"So, go ahead!" Rolling her eyes, Regina continues. "But, don't tell me that Swan or anyone of you want this out of me because you care about me! Tell me that you're scared of what's going to happen. Tell me that you're scared of the Evil Queen, please. Be honest with me and tell me that you're not actually worried about me! You're worried about yourselves, you're worried that I'll try and take over a kingdom, or a-a town? Or maybe the world? Tell me that you're _afraid_ of me with this power, you're _afraid_ of what I'll do with this! Don't lie to me and say that you want the best for me. If you're going to try and talk me out of this, at least be honest with me."

She hadn't meant to go off on him like that, not at all. But, she knew what everyone in the diner was thinking; she knew what everyone in town must've been thinking when they heard. Regina was not ignorant, not a bit, and knew why the wanted the darkness gone. Not only because of Rumple, but because of her, too. Because of the things she had done, the things that she's still capable of doing at any moment.

"I will! They are afraid of you with this darkness, Regina! With this type of magic, Regina, they're terrified of what could happen!" He starts, matching her level. His eyes dance like fire, like she's scratched the spark to start the flame. " _They_ are. I am afraid of losing the woman that I love to this! I'm here because I'm so bloody scared of losing you that I couldn't even think straight for as long as I was away from you! So, yes, I want this darkness out of you. Not because, I'm scared of what you'll do with it, I'm scared of what it'll do with you."

He's in her personal space now, and she doesn't mind. "You-you love me?" It's the first time either of them had said it out loud, though she had thought of him as her love for so long.

"Yes, I do. I want to go home and figure this out, so I can tell everyone that I love you." His hand rests on her hip, comfortably. "I want to be with you, Regina."

The moment gets deep quickly, so she changes the subject. "How did you guys even get here?"

"Believe it or not, we got some help from Zelena." Regina raises her eyebrows incredulously. "It took a small amount of, let's say 'sweet-talk', on my part. Eventually, she gave in and got us here, safely."

"Not discreetly, I see."

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 **I don't know what I'm doing with this story, which probably isn't a good thing for the author to say...but who doesn't love honesty, right? If you've been reading 'from the perfect start', I won't be updating for quite a bit.**

 **There's a few oneshots, and a story that I'm trying to continue, from a few months ago.**

 **Review, and check in for updates!**

 **xoxo, Minnie !**


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